Selfish – take 2

This week has been bittersweet.  I did the Orange County Triathlon this weekend.  I had a good race.  I finished really strong.  I had an awesome run.  I finished 4th in my age group out of 35.  I was kind of bummed at first because I was one place from getting on the podium.  But the next day I was more appreciative of how well I did and I was a little bit prouder of my results.  I am new to triathlon and as it turns out I qualified for Nationals in August.  I found out Tuesday night and confirmed it Wednesday morning.

Yipee!!! But here is where the problem lies.  If I want to go it is going to cost a fair amount of money.  And I (and others) feel it is only for my benefit.  It is selfish… or is it?  Who benefits from me going or doing any of this? I know I benefit because I feel good about my accomplishments.  I have fun. I meet and interact with interesting people.  But what do the others in my life get out of it?

They do get a happier more balanced mother/wife.  And hopefully I am serving as some type of role model to my children.  But I am absent a lot on the weekend mornings while I train.  I do my best to workout at times that don’t effect the rest of the family but at this level it is unavoidable.  It will only get worse once I start to train for a full Ironman.  And there is the sheer monetary component of all this.  It is expensive.  And I want to compete as much as possible.  Racing/competing keeps me focused.

So I wonder how selfish I am being and how selfish I can be before I cross the line… I REALLY want to go to Nationals.  I will do everything I can to make it happen.  I just hope that isn’t too selfish.

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4 comments

  1. Hi Becca, look, you worked hard and you do serve as a role model to your kids. This is a great opportunity for you and it definitely warrants a family discussion. Your kids want to see you happy as much as you want to see them happy. Talk it out, see how everyone feels and whatever decision you and your family make, everyone will win in the long run.

    Congrats on your success on the race course!! I always admired your training and discipline!

  2. It is not selfish at all. As parents we give everything we can to our kids and to our spouses but there has to be a return otherwise that balance falls out of whack and that is where things can get screwy.

    Be selfish every now and again. It is balance just like training for a triathlon. Too much in one sport and the others fail.

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